


you make me feel so young

by bleakmidwinter



Category: Rope (1948)
Genre: 1940s, Boarding School, Dorms, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Kissing, M/M, Pre-Canon, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-13
Packaged: 2019-08-01 08:54:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16281491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bleakmidwinter/pseuds/bleakmidwinter
Summary: or aka: five times david kentley cockblocked brandon shaw and phillip morgan and the one time he didn't





	you make me feel so young

**Author's Note:**

> title from frank sinatra's "you make me feel so young"

When it first happens, Brandon and Phillip are riding high on the blinding adolescent love of young prep school sweethearts. After months of courting and prodding and testing the waters, Phillip finally gains the courage to lean in and peck Brandon on the cheek. 

 

Brandon of course doesn't take this gesture lightly, jaw dropping slightly, and his lips curling at the edges, and the bed creaks as he leans in to give Phillip a proper kiss. 

 

It could have been perfect.

 

Their lips are barely an inch apart when the door to their dorm room begins to open. Phillip recoils violently as if he were burned, bumping his hip on his bed frame and biting his lip to muffle his cry of pain. 

 

Brandon watches bug eyed as David enters and smiles at them. “Hey you two, why do you look like I've caught you red handed?” 

 

Brandon laughs nervously. “You haven't. Phillip and I were just practicing a monologue.”

 

“Alright,” David says in his all too perfect voice, “Whatever you say.” 

 

David begins to disrobe to change into other clothes and as per usual he stops after he's stark naked and moves like  _ that _ to the drawer in his desk where he keeps his cigarette case and lighter. 

 

Phillip glances once at David's body and then awkwardly stares at the floor. Brandon rolls his eyes and stands, walking with his hands in his pockets to the door. “I'm going for a walk,” he says, making it seem as if he's speaking to no one in particular, but he knows Phillip will pick up on it.

 

“Might I join you?” Phillip asks cooly as David, still nude, takes a drag and gives them a curious look.

 

Brandon nods and quickly strides out the door, Phillip hot on his heels. They slam the door shut.  
  


* * *

 

They've been kissing for almost a half hour.

 

Phillip's not particularly experienced in kissing, in fact he's never done it before Brandon, perhaps once in kindergarten with a girl he'd never had feelings for, but that was when he was a child. In the height of his hormonal youth, this is the time it counts most, to learn how to get it  _ right _ .

 

Brandon certainly knows how to take the lead, and he talks him through it. They've kissed a couple times since their first kiss, but it's hard to get time alone, even now there is a chance of one of their roommates returning early from class. Kenneth or David. Kenneth, ever the gentleman, always knocks. David, barges in and strips down to his socks, saying he needs to allow his body to  _ breathe _ .

 

“Open your mouth a bit more, don't be afraid,” Brandon whispers against his lips, and Phillip shivers, placing one hand on the lapels of Brandon's uniform, gripping tightly. His head feels warm and fuzzy, especially when Brandon tugs lightly at the hair on the nape of his neck. 

 

The door makes a sound and Phillip yelps, pushing Brandon off of him so hard he goes flying off the bed and lands on his ass on the wood floor. He's horrified when he sees what he's done.

 

Brandon glares at him and mouths  _ OW!, _ when David curtly shuffles in and shuts the door. 

 

David pauses when he sees Phillip's flushed face and Brandon on the floor, clothes disheveled. 

 

“Have you two been fighting?” He asks and Brandon sighs.

 

“Yes!” Phillip blurts out. “Wrestling. Brandon stole a pen of mine that's important to me.”

 

Brandon chuckles, genuinely amused, as if he thinks it a game. “Oh, yes. I'm a thief.”

 

David snorts. “Right. Be careful when you wrestle next time, boys.” He begins to take his uniform off and then drops his trousers. Phillip averts his eyes. “Wouldn't want someone to walk in and get the wrong idea.”

 

Brandon's expression drops into something placid and cold. “No, that would be unfortunate.”

 

* * *

“B-Brandon, what if David walks in again?” Phillip asks quietly, as Brandon kisses his neck and rubs at his groin. Phillip's not going to be able to argue much longer if Brandon continues what he's doing.

 

Brandon hovers over him, glossy eyes staring directly into Phillip's dark ones. He smirks. “What? When I've locked the door and David always forgets his keys? Also, Kenneth is in class. We're safe to do whatever we please.”

 

Brandon leans down and kisses Phillip's nose. “Free,” he kisses his lips in a haste, “from any,” and trails down his throat, “unnecessary” he picks up Phillip’s hand and kisses his middle knuckle, “prying eyes.” 

 

Phillip blinks multiple times and swallows as Brandon rolls his hips down and kisses him at the same time. He whimpers into Brandon's mouth and then whimpers much louder in fear when the door handle rattles and a confused noise is heard from the other side. 

 

Brandon practically growls. “Oh, you must be joking,” he mutters, rolling off Phillip and covering Phillip's lower half with a blanket. “Pretend you're sleeping,” he whispers urgently.

 

Phillip is shaking with nerves but he squeezes his eyes shut and rolls over to face the wall. David opens the door then and stumbles in, keys in hand.

 

“Sorry, I didn't mean to lock it. Did it out of habit,” Brandon says quietly, and then places a finger to his lips, gesturing to Phillip. “Gettin’ his beauty sleep,” Brandon jokes.

 

David narrows his eyes and shuts the door relatively quiet. “Why's he in your bed?”

 

Phillip tenses up, and Brandon clears his throat. “He was just sitting there studying and fell asleep.” Brandon laughs awkwardly and there is a deafening silence before David shrugs and begins removing his clothes for the (at least) 50th time this week. Brandon doesn't hide his sigh as he sits down on Phillip's bed and takes out a cigarette from the case in his pocket.

 

“Class let out early?” Brandon questions, staring at Phillip who is obviously awake. 

 

David nods. “Yep.”

 

* * *

 

The shower. This is risky because anyone could walk into their sector if they wanted to, and Phillip and Brandon would be ridiculed or brutally beaten for being together in the way that they are, but they both feel as if they have the upperhand,  _ finally _ .

 

They picked a time when rarely anyone comes down to the showers and they've picked the sector that everyone is too lazy to walk all the way down to. The walls obscure most of their bodies, but their heads are mostly visible to anyone walking in.

 

Brandon has Phillip cornered into the tile wall and he's kissing him so fiercely Phillip starts to feel the joints in his knees go weak. 

 

If they're making noise, the sound coming from the showerhead next to them blocks it out.

 

“You're beautiful when your hair is wet, Phillip,” Brandon says, eyes sparking like a wild animal, and he stares at the shiny dark curls on his Phillip's head.  

 

“And you look like a fool,” Phillip teases with a flick to Brandon's shoulder. Brandon's brow is furrowed at the comment before he breaks into a grin.

 

“Oh, you wanna play then?”

 

“No, don't-” Phillip warns with a giggle as Brandon digs his fingers below Phillip's spine and Phillips shrieks and nearly slips down the wall and off his feet. “No, no, no, too much!  _ Stop! _ ” He laughs hysterically and Brandon shows him mercy, half because he hears the door to the shower room open. He's tall enough to peer over the wall, so he does, on his tip toes.

 

Brandon gasps and drops back down to his heels. “Oh dear.”

 

“What is it?” Phillip asks frantically. 

 

“ _ David! _ ” Brandon whisper-shouts. Phillip squeezes his eyes shut angrily so he doesn't scream right then and there. 

 

David just decides to walk all the way down to the sector right next to theirs and remove his clothes and start showering.

 

Right. Beside. Them.

 

Phillip sinks down the floor awkwardly, hiding out of view of David. Brandon tries his best to maintain his composure when David glances over at him and grins, dumbly.

 

“Hey, Brando.”

 

“Hello, David.”

 

* * *

 

“They’re both back home this weekend,” Brandon whispers, nosing at the soft skin above Phillip’s waistband. Phillip has both hands on Brandon’s shoulders, not stopping him, but not encouraging him either.

 

“How are you certain?” Phillip whines, and Brandon tugs lightly at the band, snapping it back against his sensitive skin.

  
“I’m not, Phillip, but when do they ever leave at the same time? We must take advantage of these opportunities.” 

 

“I’m nervous.” 

 

Brandon looks up at Phillip whose cheeks are a rosy color pink and who looks so sweet and fragile, but harbors a darker side underneath that Brandon is irrevocably attracted to. 

“We’ll be fine. It’s you and me. If anything threatens to tear us apart we’ll have to eradicate it. Simple as that,” Brandon responds. 

 

Phillip’s eyes glisten and he sits in thought for a moment before nodding, and Brandon scoots down the bed slightly to get a better angle, and kisses up Phillip’s thighs.

 

Perhaps the most ironic event in either of their lives, David walks in just in that moment. Enough time for Phillip to tug the sheets over Brandon’s head and make it seem like he’s laying in bed alone. He grabs a pillow and places it over Brandon’s head where a lump shows through the bed sheets. There is a muffled groan, Brandon probably struggling to breath, but not loud enough for David to hear.

 

“D-David! I thought you were meant to be traveling,” Phillip says with a shaky voice, and David begins to strip, not taking notice of the sheets seeming a bit bulkier than usual.

 

“Ma’ didn’t pick me up. She’s sick or something again. That woman’s always getting sick.

 

Phillip almost shrieks when he feels Brandon move against his groin, “DON’T!” He shouts and David swerves to face Phillip who feels his brain is about to drip out his nose.

 

“Don’t, you think,” Phillip says, trying to craft a sentence on the spot. Brandon is usually the one to save face, he’s not used to this. “Don’t you think she should go to a doctor?” 

 

David shrugs, tearing off his last undergarments. “I suppose.” Much to Phillip’s relief, David grabs his robe and adds, “I think I’m going to go take a shower.”

 

“Have a good time,” Phillip responds and then questions why he even opens his mouth. What kind of response is that? 

 

“You’re so queer,” David says with a dry chuckle, and ties his robe before heading out of the dorm room. Brandon wiggles out from underneath the sheets and rolls off the bed, sitting on the floor, breathing deeply.

 

“Are you okay?” Phillip asks, scrambling out of bed to sit next to him. 

 

Brandon’s face is red and his heavy breathing is just starting to slow down when he says darkly, “I despise him.”

 

Phillip nods quaintly and leans his forehead against Brandon’s shoulder. 

 

* * *

 

It’s a few months later, and Brandon and Phillip have mostly been focusing on end of the year finals, studying or paying attention in class rather than staring at each other. They still have breakfast, lunch, and dinner together and listen to the radio together on weekends, mostly classical music, but ever since their last encounter with nearly being caught, they’d both been wary when it’d come to their odd romance.

 

Odd would be the way it would be described by anyone that saw them together, but Phillip doesn't feel odd with Brandon. He never believed finding true love at this young an age would be possible, but he can’t think of a life without Brandon. If listening to the radio and brushing fingers when David and Kenneth aren't looking is the rest of their lives, then Phillip thinks he can survive. But they won’t be stuck in this room or this school forever. Perhaps one day, they could move on  _ together _ .

 

A few days after finals, and a week before they have to go home for summer, Brandon leaves a note for Phillip, highly uncharacteristic of him, in his locker. “Meet me at the stairwell in the church, tonight at sundown.”

 

In all their years together in prep school, Brandon had not once left a note. Phillip keeps it in his pocket, and anxiously goes about his day. This is the one day they don’t share classes, and it’s already past dinner. He doesn’t have time to question Brandon, even if he knew where he was.

 

He spends the rest of the day after his last class in his room, staring out the window at the sun slowly descending behind the buildings and mountains in the distance. David and Kenneth prattle on about god knows what on their bunk bed, and David is surprisingly clothed. 

 

“What’re you daydreaming about, Philly?” David questions smugly. “A girl finally crack those virgin walls of yours?” 

 

Kenneth chuckles, yet not entirely invested in David’s teasing. 

 

“None of your business,” Phillip replies, gaze averted.

 

“Alright, Morgan, no need to get your knickers twisted,” David snorts and breathes a large puff of smoke out in Phillip’s direction. 

 

Now. It isn’t quite sundown, but he needs to go  _ now _ . Before he snaps and tells David and Kenneth everything, before he shouts it at them at the top of his lungs, and before he alienates himself from them and the entire school after the news spreads around school. 

 

He stands up abruptly and grabs his uniform jacket, pinning it at the waist. He heads for the door, and David splutters.

 

“Hey where are you going? Not actually angry with me are you?”

 

“Of course not,” Phillip grits his teeth. He bites back the response of telling them he’s going to see Brandon and says, “I’m going for a walk,” instead.

 

David nods, not entirely convinced, and Phillip leaves, the air outside his dorm room relieving and fresh. He practically runs to the church after taking in the cool breeze, dirt bursting into clouds underneath his shoes, and he trips at the stairs. It might have actually been good he left when he did, as the sun seems to descend at a quicker pace now, the sky turning orange and pink rapidly. 

 

Phillip wonders what Brandon could possibly want with him in the church. No one comes here at this hour. And when he walks in and sees Brandon standing at the stairwell in the back with a smirk on his face, suspicion rumbles around in his stomach. 

 

“Brandon,” Phillip stutters as he slowly walks towards him. “What’s this about?”   
  


“Come with me,” Brandon whispers, holding out a hand. He hasn’t looked this excited in months. Phillip takes his hand without hesitation and is dragged up the spiral staircase into the attic.

 

“I didn’t even know this place had an attic,” Phillip notes as Brandon closes the hatch leading into the attic and locks it. “Are we allowed up here?”

 

“Doesn’t matter,” Brandon replies simply and flips on the light switch. Phillip’s jaw drops when he sees the display. There is a large red blanket laid out on the floor before them, and candles not yet lit lining the sides. “Hungry?” Brandon asks. He opens a small case, taking out a sandwich wrapped up in thin paper.

 

“Made it m-myself,” Brandon says hysterically, as if he’s searching for immediate validation. Phillip can’t help the smile that takes over his features. He looks up at the small circular window where a deep orange glow shines through giving the otherwise musky attic a warm, homey feel.

 

“I scoured the campus for some place David would never go, where people in general wouldn’t want to go, and I made it our own, at least for tonight. What do you think?” 

 

Brandon is staring so intently at Phillip, that Phillip feels his chest swell with something unfamiliar and his eyes burn. “I think…um.”

 

“Do you dislike it?” Brandon’s intensity is fading, and Phillip can’t have that. He feels ecstatically high when Brandon’s attention is almost entirely aimed in his direction.

 

“I think you don’t deserve me, you deserve someone better,” Phillip says quietly, and sits on the silky blanket, trailing the wax of the candles beside him with a finger. Brandon falls to his knees next to him and grabs Phillip’s face in his hands.

 

“Listen here,” He says, intently. “You’re the only one who deserves me. And I’m the only one who deserves you. We’re smarter than the others Phillip, you’ll understand that one day. We are meant for each other. You and me, we're, well, we're superior.” 

 

Brandon's eyes are like voids, and it's hard to see what he truly wants at their depths.

 

Phillip glances from his eyes to his lips, realizing this is the first time they’ve had such a free space to be together, in the way they want and need. “I think I love you. No, wait, I-”

 

He closes his eyes. Brandon’s hands have trailed down to his neck, and he’s remaining speechless for once. Phillip opens his eyes when he’s gained the last strands of confidence he needs. “I  _ do _ , love you, I mean.”

 

Brandon stares at him with such a genuinity that he’s never shared, that Phillip is afraid for a moment he’s stepped over a line, but Brandon leans forward and kisses him as if there were no David in the world to stop them.

 

It’s soft and passionate all at once, and Phillip feels it warm in his head when Brandon pulls away. “I love you too, Phillip. I wouldn’t do all this for just anyone.”

 

He gestures to the candles and the sandwiches discarded for now on the blanket beneath them. Phillip giggles and Brandon pulls him in. “One day I’m going to get us a bigger place, bigger than this one, with large windows so we can view any landscape you wish. And we won’t be stopped by anyone, and no one is going to get in the way of us being a part of society, we’re better than society. And I'll work hard to make it happen I promise you that. No more pretending to be inferior. No more submitting.”

 

“No more David,” Phillip mutters into his chest, and Brandon reaches up to smooth down Phillip’s hair. He laughs.

 

“Yes, no more David. I’m sure we could arrange that, as well.” 

**Author's Note:**

> this was self indulgent to say the least, i love them


End file.
